“He was only twelve, and understood that his experience of the world was limited, but one thing he was quite sure of: when someone said trust me, they were usually lying through their teeth.” CBR11 Review 52.

Welcome to The Institute, my favorite book of 2019.

Was it the best book of 2019? Probably not. But I can’t think of a reading experience that I enjoyed more than this. This book brought me back to the feelings I had when I first discovered Stephen King, back in Junior High, staying up late at night, scared to death about what might happen to my favorite characters. Its been MANY years since those first late-night readings of The Shining and Thinner (not his greatest work, but no book EVER has made more of a lasting impression on me than Thinner. I can remember staying up all night long to read it, and how the ending GUTTED me), mostly worrying about the kids in the story, and if they would survive whatever hell had come down upon them. This story brought me back to being a kid again. Thanks, Uncle Stevie.

In the middle of the night, in a house on a quiet street in suburban Minneapolis, intruders silently murder Luke Ellis’s parents and load him into a black SUV. The operation takes less than two minutes. Luke will wake up at The Institute, in a room that looks just like his own, except there’s no window. And outside his door are other doors, behind which are other kids with special talents—telekinesis and telepathy—who got to this place the same way Luke did: Kalisha, Nick, George, Iris, and ten-year-old Avery Dixon. They are all in Front Half. Others, Luke learns, graduated to Back Half, “like the roach motel,” Kalisha says. “You check in, but you don’t check out.”

In this most sinister of institutions, the director, Mrs. Sigsby, and her staff are ruthlessly dedicated to extracting from these children the force of their extranormal gifts. There are no scruples here. If you go along, you get tokens for the vending machines. If you don’t, punishment is brutal. As each new victim disappears to Back Half, Luke becomes more and more desperate to get out and get help. But no one has ever escaped from the Institute.

As psychically terrifying as Firestarter, and with the spectacular kid power of It, The Institute is Stephen King’s gut-wrenchingly dramatic story of good vs. evil in a world where the good guys don’t always win.

The Institute starts off slowly…King introduces Tim Jamieson, a former Florida cop looking to start a new life in a small South Carolina town. King seems in no rush to get the plot moving, instead doing what he does best — bringing a small town and its residents to life. Tim gets a job at the Sheriff’s department as a Night Knocker, patrolling the town all night long, making sure the community is safe. Tim starts to settle in to his new life, when suddenly…

We aren’t talking about Tim anymore. And don’t think about him for hundreds of pages.

Now King shifts the focus to child prodigy (and sometimes mild telekinetic) Luke Ellis, a 12 year old from Minneapolis who is about to start college at Harvard. One night, a black SUV pulls up in front of Luke’s house, the people in the car break in, murder Luke’s parents, and kidnap a drugged Luke.

When he wakes up, he is in his bedroom, but it isn’t really his bedroom. There aren’t any windows, and some of his trophies are missing. A startled and confused Luke makes his way outside, where he discovers that he is now at The Institute, somewhere in the deep woods of Maine. A place for kids who have either telekinesis (TK) or telepathy (TP), where they are supposedly trained as secret agents of the government, but in reality, are tortured (and sometimes even killed) in order to test the limits of their powers.

The Institute is run by Mrs. Sigsby, one of the worst King villians in a long time. Her prim pantsuits and calm demeanor can’t hide the fact that she is a monster who enjoys her work and the power she has over the children under her purview. Luke and his new friends (Nicky, Kalisha, George, Helen, Iris, and especially Avery), are subjected to horrible tests and unspeakable acts of torture, as the doctors at The Institute attempt to increase/improve/evolve the potential powers of the children there.

Luke is different than the other kids, though. He is literally a genius, and he has had enough. After he witnesses the death of one of the kids living with him, he decides to plan his escape, and to take down The Institute — and Mrs. Sigsby.

There is a ton of action, some great relationships, and some fun characters here. While I love when King takes his time to describe things, I also love when he ratchets up the tension and has short, one paragraph-long chapters that let you know THE SHIT IS ABOUT TO GO DOWN.

I listened to the audiobook of this, and was constantly trying to find excuses to get in the car and listen, or go for a walk and listen. Turning it off was painful. I needed to know what was going to happen next. I needed to know which kids would make it out alive (because, I knew most of them wouldn’t, and its never a good idea to get attached to anyone in a King story). I needed to know what was going to happen to Luke and Tim and Mrs. Sigsby. And once again (for the fourth time this year), kudos to Santino Fontana for narrating the crap out of this book. He did a great job creating different voices for each character and keeping me invested and on the edge of my seat.

The ending wasn’t perfect, but so much better than some of King’s famous mis-steps, that I didn’t care. I enjoyed every second of this book. Even when it made me cry. Glad to have read this as my cannonball book this year!

“But the only way never to do the wrong thing is never to do anything.” CBR11 Reviews 50 & 51.

Trying so hard to finish up my Cannonball this year, so I’m hitting up my backlog of unreviewed books for the year. I read some (actually, SO MANY) great books that I just never got around to reviewing, and while perusing the list, I figured you can never go wrong with a little Harry Dresden/James Marsters action. What follows is not really a review…its seems to be more like my random thoughts about these two books, as it has been a while since I listened and my brain has trouble telling these books apart.

First up: Proven Guilty.

From Amazon:

There’s no love lost between Harry Dresden, the only wizard in the Chicago phone book, and the White Council of Wizards, who find him brash and undisciplined. But war with the vampires has thinned their ranks, so the Council has drafted Harry as a Warden and assigned him to look into rumors of black magic in the Windy City.

As Harry adjusts to his new role, another problem arrives in the form of the tattooed and pierced daughter of an old friend—all grown up and already in trouble. Her boyfriend is the only suspect in what looks like a supernatural assault straight out of a horror film. Malevolent entities that feed on fear are loose in Chicago, but it’s all in a day’s work for a wizard, his faithful dog, and a talking skull named Bob…

Wow, that quote isn’t really helping me to remember much, other than that this is the book that brings young Molly Carpenter into the fold as a major character.

A series of creepy murders — based upon scenes from horror movies — take place at a horror movie convention, SPLATTERCON!!!. Michael and Charity’s oldest daughter Molly — no longer a cute little girl, but now a pierced and tattooed teen with crazy hair — brings the case to Harry, because she and her boyfriend and other friends have been working at the convention and are scared.

Molly is kidnapped by the creatures causing the mayhem, and brought to the Never Never, where she is rescued by Murphy, Harry, and Charity.

Of course, there’s more to the story than that. Molly has been learning to use magic, hoping to be able to save her boyfriend and best friend from their vices. Turns out that in the magic world, this is a big no-no, and is punishable by death. As a warden of the council, Harry stands by her at trial and it is decided that he will be her sponsor and help her to learn magic responsibly.

Meanwhile, of course there’s some nonsense with vampires, Harry’s relationship with Karin Murphy, his brother Thomas, and Bob. Can’t get enough of Bob.

Proven Guilty flows right into White Night.

Meet Harry Dresden, Chicago’s first (and only) Wizard P.I. Turns out the ‘everyday’ world is full of strange and magical things – and most of them don’t play well with humans. That’s where Harry comes in. A series of apparent suicides rings alarm bells with the police, and Harry is hired. At the first crime scene he hits pay dirt, discovering an unmistakable magical taint. There’s also a message especially for him, and it ain’t pretty. The ‘killings’ will continue if Harry can’t halt his tormentor, but the evidence implicates his half-brother, which just doesn’t add up. Unfortunately Harry’s digging around attracts some powerful vampires with a stake in the result. Soon, whichever way he turns, Harry will find himself outnumbered, outclassed and dangerously susceptible to temptation. And if he screws up, his friends will die. Magic – it can get a guy killed.

Another crappy blurb. Not helping me remember much at all!

What I do remember is that this one has Elaine, Gentleman John Marcone, a group of women dying under mysterious circumstances, and a HUGE vampire battle underneath Thomas’ family estate, and flashbacks to a horrible warden incident in the desert.

I’m always wary of the stories that include Elaine. I know that these are all fictional characters, BUT I DON’T TRUST HER. #TEAMMURPHY

The battle scene was long but pretty exciting. Of course Murphy kicked ass, and it was interesting to see how Marcone joined the fight in exchange for power in the Never Never (I think?). I mostly worried about Ramirez, who I loved as a foil to Harry, and Mouse, because he’s a good boy.

As always, James Marsters did an excellent job narrating these stories. I don’t know if I would ever have read these books without him, to be honest. He truly brings Harry to life. He makes me laugh, and he even made me cry in White Night, telling the story of Helen Beckkitt’s daughter.

I’ve already started listening to Small Favor. These audiobooks are like comfort food for my ears. Thank you to all of the Cannonballers before me who made sure to mention these books over and over — I never would have known about them otherwise.

The situation gets rough then I start to panic. CBR11 Review 49.

Mary H.K. Choi’s Emergency Contact is going on my list of favorite books of 2019, so there was no doubt I was going to read Permanent Record as soon as I could get my hands on it.

Pablo Neruda Rind, the half Korean and half Pakistani son of a pair of poetry lovers, is in a rut. Since he dropped out of NYU after (during? unclear.) his freshman year, he works the nightshift in a fancy Brooklyn bodega and hangs out with his roommates. He struggles with money, always wondering how he will be able to pay his share of the rent, and hiding all of his bills and letters from collection agencies into his sock drawer. He is frozen by his general anxiety about his stalled life, and can’t seem to do anything about it.

One night, superstar Leanna Smart comes into the bodega looking for snacks. It takes Pablo a minute to figure out who she is (QUESTION: is it ever explained how he knew who she was because of the name on her credit card? Her other (real?) name is mentioned and then never brought up again. Wasn’t sure if I missed something), and by the time he realizes he should be star struck, they’ve already been chatting and flirting for a while.

After a tiny bit of instagram flirting via hashtag (#spelunk), she shows up again, and the two of them end up on a private jet to LA for a few days to get to know each other better. He drops everything, and doesn’t tell anyone where’s he’s going, simply to spend some more time with the two versions of Leanna — the public star that everyone in the world sees, and the private girl that only a few people have the chance to get to know.

After Pablo signs a 100 page NDA, promising not to mention the nature of his relationship with Lee to anyone, ever, for the rest of time, they spend a fun night at the hotel, and then a nice day with her grandmother.

And then this is where the book loses me.

SPOILERS TO FOLLOW

Pablo can’t get back to New York due to a blizzard. He has to miss work and the college interview that his mother made him promise to go to. He deals with it by ignoring it, which, I GET. But it does not make Pablo a particularly endearing character.

And it make’s Lee an even less endearing character, as she simply doesn’t seem to care that his life has been disrupted because she wanted to hang out with him. For the rest of the book, her needs and wants constantly trump Pablo’s, because she is more important, and he just needs to understand that.

At one point, she convinces him to fly to Seoul with her, and then she more or less ditches him there for a whole day, without any money, no way to contact her, and no way to get back into the hotel room if he decides to leave. And she pretty much wants him to feel badly for her, not the other way around. This was the moment I decided that I hated her.

Listen. I get that our the cost of our higher education is crazy, and that student loans are terrible. I understand that anxiety and depression cause people to act in ways that they know don’t make sense.

But Pablo. Come on. Move back in with your mother. Take the bills out of your sock drawer. Stop blaming other people for becoming successful because you think it should have been you.

MORE SPOILERS

I was beyond relieved when Pablo seemed to get his life in order and started his job as a waiter going to school part time. HOWEVER, I was annoyed that he was planning a career as a youtube food influencer. I was also glad that he turned down Lee’s offer to go on tour with her, as she clearly hadn’t grown at all as a person in the time they had been apart. (I actually had to read ahead after the Korea part of the story, because if they had ended up together, I wouldn’t have finished the book).

I don’t really know how I felt about this book. I didn’t like the characters. I didn’t like or understand their arcs. However, like in Emergency Contact, I thought her approach to talking about money and wealth was the most interesting part of the story.

I still love Choi’s writing, and will keep looking for new stuff from her, but this wasn’t my favorite.

Settle in for a cozy read with a Tim Horton’s coffee and a cruller. CBR11 Review 48.

Yes, this was yet another Jane Austen retelling. I was all about those this year. Supposedly, it was based on Pride & Prejudice…and I guess I see that, but it wasn’t a strict retelling. It was more of an homage.

From Amazon:

AYESHA SHAMSI has a lot going on.  Her dreams of being a poet have been set aside for a teaching job so she can pay off her debts to her wealthy uncle. She lives with her boisterous Muslim family and is always being reminded that her flighty younger cousin, Hafsa, is close to rejecting her one hundredth marriage proposal. Though Ayesha is lonely, she doesn’t want an arranged marriage. Then she meets Khalid who is just as smart and handsome as he is conservative and judgmental. She is irritatingly attracted to someone who looks down on her choices and dresses like he belongs in the seventh century.

When a surprise engagement between Khalid and Hafsa is announced, Ayesha is torn between how she feels about the straightforward Khalid and his family; and the truth she realizes about herself. But Khalid is also wrestling with what he believes and what he wants. And he just can’t get this beautiful, outspoken woman out of his mind.

Ayesha lives with her widowed mother and younger brother in her grandparents Toronto townhouse. After her father died under mysterious circumstances , she and her family fled from India, to the open arms of her wealthy uncle, who had emigrated with his wife and children years before. Ayesha is especially close with her beautiful —but flighty — cousin Hafsa.

Ayesha is training to be a teacher, but in her heart she is a poet. Her grandfather taught her to love language, and always quotes Shakespeare to her. She performs at open mic night at her local “lounge”, mostly poems about what is expected of her as a young, single Muslim woman, and what people see when they look at her.

Khalid lives across the street with his mother, and he thinks Ayesha is beautiful. Khalid is a devout Muslim — he wears long white robes every day, and wears a long beard and a skullcap. Some people at his office find his appearance a bit extreme, but he feels that it is important to let people know what kind of person he is and what sort of beliefs he has just by looking at him.

They meet under circumstances of mistaken identity, and things don’t go well. He sees a woman who doesn’t take her Muslim background seriously, and she sees a man who takes his all too seriously.

Throw in a bigoted boss, some enthusiastic lingerie designers, a self-help wrestling guru, a clueless frat-type “bro”, and various other friends and family, and lots of misunderstandings and miscommunications, and there’s your story.

As a standalone story, I enjoyed it. I always appreciate reading about different cultures and traditions. Ayesha and her family were likable and fun to read about. And I was rooting for Ayesha and Khalid to sort out their stupid nonsense and get together in the end.

But where this book didn’t work for me was in its need to check off all of the Pride & Prejudice plot boxes, even if they didn’t quite fit into the story. Out of nowhere, Khalid’s mother became the evil Lady Catherine stand in character, and I think the story suffered for that.

Burn, baby, burn. CBR11 Review 47.

Clearly, 2019 has been my year of reading Jane Austen reboots and Stephen King. I’m not complaining. For some reason, I just needed some cozy reading this year, and I didn’t stray too far from my comfort zone.

I first read Firestarter so long ago that I can’t even remember reading it.*** I know I did, because I’ve always been a completist like that, but I just don’t remember. I assume I was in 8th or 9th grade, which was NOT recently, so I was happy to revisit it.

***I do remember one detail from my original reading. I remember after reading about how Charlie’s mom was tortured and had her fingernails pulled out that I asked my mom, who was a nurse, about how fingernails worked. I had completely forgotten about that conversation until I reread that scene.

While the first few chapters are filled with uncomfortable 1980s racial/ethnic/gender slurs and commentary, the rest feels almost like it could have been written today. Its a pretty taut thriller, and has one of the few Stephen King endings that I wouldn’t change in any way.

I think most of us know the story:

Andy McGee and his daughter Charlie are on the run from a secret government agency called THE SHOP. Back when Andy was in college, he and his future wife, Vicky, took part in an experiment for money, and took a drug that ended up killing some participants, driving some others insane, and leaving the others with psychic powers like telepathy and telekinesis. The Shop, with help from the kooky psychology professor at their college, ran and monitored the experiement, and continued the monitoring for years after the fact, always keeping an eye on Andy and Vicky, especially after they had a baby. The Shop was obsessed with the potential powers that their daughter might possess.

And it turns out, The Shop should have been a little bit scared as well. Charlie did not have the mild powers of her mother (who could sometimes shut a door from across the room) or the “push” capabilities of her father (who could control people’s minds, but not without a negative physical reaction). Charlie was a pyrokinetic. She could start fires with her mind.

As Charlie and Andy run from town to town, trying to stay safe, The Shop always seems to be one step ahead of them, showing up just when Charlie and Andy think they are safe at last.

Eventually, Charlie and Andy are captured by John Rainbird, a hitman who works for The Shop’s defacto leader, Cap Hollister. They are brought down to headquarters in rural Virginia, immediately separated, drugged, and tested. They go months without seeing each other, until one day, Andy realizes he needs to wake up from his drugged state and save his daughter.

The last third of the book is more or less a huge battle scene — the McGees against The Shop, and it moves fast and furiously. And even when the battle is over, and the story seems to be winding down, the feeling of dread never goes away, and we know there’s more trouble coming for Team McGee. The bad guys will never let up until Charlie and Andy are permanently out of the picture. Until the very last page, we worry about poor little Charlie, until (SPOILERS FOR A 30 YEAR OLD BOOK) she walks into the office at Rolling Stone, and we know she’s going to be all right.

I went straight from this one into reading The Institute, so I’m all about kids with crazy powers and shady government agencies right now.